Honest New Year Resolutions

Yes, a new year is upon us and like the rest of the heard, I am sure you have made some resolutions about how you will be a better person this coming year. I applaud your originality, OK, that ruins my “no sarcasm” resolution, and I am writing this on New Year’s Eve.

Last year I wrote some Sarcastic New Year’s Resolutions, so why break with an old tradition let us see if I can hit a few more of the more trendy resolutions for 2014.

Financial Resolutions for Next Year

As I pointed out the “not write any more sarcastic posts” one is already shredded, so we shall forget that one completely.

1. Control impulse spending better than last year, but those boxing quarter sales are just so enticing, I am not sure how I can stop myself from not buying that 110 inch TV for $150K. Seriously, I am only human, how can anyone resist that?
2. So the automatic saving thing didn’t work too well this past year, so what I should do is put the money in my TFSA, that way I know I can’t easily take money out every month. That may cause a problem around March when all the Christmas bills show up, so I might have to then get another line of credit to pay for all of this, so I had better not have a resolution about not adding any more credit lines to my financial world.
3. Don’t join a gym this year, since I haven’t figured out how to cancel last year’s gym membership, so maybe I’ll buy some exercise equipment. I figure a tread-mill, stationary bike and an elliptical trainer (and maybe some free weights) should be sufficient, and the fitness supplier has a buy now, pay at the end of the year deal, so that will work out well (if I can figure out how to cancel my old gym membership).
4. I should really get a new car, because my current one is a bit tatty, and with a lease it is dead simple and so cheap. Another bi-weekly payment won’t hurt me (that much), and I get to raise my self-worth by getting a new car (and not that crappy old thing I am currently driving). Cars are a valuable asset, so it will actually make me worth more.
5. Eat out less than we did last year, of course we ate out 4 out of 7 nights last year, so I only need to go out 3 out of 7 nights and we are ahead, so that should be easy (except when you get home and you really don’t feel like cooking, but you are hungry, then that doesn’t really count).
6. To save money on coffee and lunch at work, I am just going to steal other folks’ lunches out of the fridge, and drink coffee from the coffee fund, and just not pay for it. This means this is basically free, and a huge saving, except for those days where I really need a latte, then screw it, I am going to get my $7.50 coffee!
7. Get rid of cable, because it is too expensive, but then I can sit at home and complain about nothing to watch on TV and be generally miserable. I could get an antenna, but it would make me happier just to bitch and complain, and it would help me feel more pious as well.

Any other useful resolutions that I have missed?